A Suitable Boy: Ishan Khatter perfects non-creepy lovelorn looks
For as long as I can remember, Indian media has been confusing harassment for romance and desire for creepiness. Somehow interpreting the ‘all’ in ‘all is fair in love and war’ to include harassment, abuse, and violence. We grew up watching Bollywood movies and listening to songs that perpetually glorify the acts of stalking, harassing, and invading one’s personal territory.
In this sea of flawed misogynist ‘heroes’, Ishan Khatter’s Maan is a breath of fresh air.
Maan is clearly enchanted by Saeeda as soon as he lays eyes on her. He gravitates towards her, quite literally- moving from the lawn to the back of the gathering to sitting right in front of her by the end of her performance, in their very first scene together. He courts her and woos her with gifts and sincere attention. They finally start seeing each other, fully aware of the consequences of their dalliance but not willing to end it.
As someone who hasn’t read Vikram Seth’s novel, and is very used to the casually violent way that women are portrayed in India, I was pleasantly surprised by the sensitivity and respect in the relationship between Maan and Saeeda. Maybe it is to distinguish him from her other clients, like the rude and dismissive maharaja, but Maan is just the right amount of respectful and silly with Saeeda (before the crazy jealous rage, of course).
He respects her religion (he did not realize the significance of her distributing water to the procession on Muharram, but quickly backtracked when Firoz explained it to him), her wish for distance when she asks for it, goes away when he is asked without making it a whole thing, he gifts her a beautiful book of Urdu because he understands and appreciates her love for Ghazals. He seems to genuinely want to be around her, and not just for ‘the only thing men want’.
Anyhow, my new goal in life is now to find someone who looks at me the way Maan looks at Saeeda.